Whatever you do don't look at my poor dead cousin ralphie that that phony dead alien.
Hat tip to: blogcritics
They'd have to pry the gun out of my cold, dead hands after I shot the cruel heartless son of a freaking beyotch who told me to leave my best friend to starve to death. My dog means more to me than all the a-hole bureaucrats that ever lived.
Don't press your luck.
Do YOU have your emergency kit ready? Would you have enough food,
water, medicine, booze, etc. stocked up so you don't have to starve for
a week until help arrives?
Do you live below sea level, next to a river that floods every year, on
a coastline where hurricaines play? Can you swim? Sooner or later,
you'll have to.
There is a natural tendency among you silly humans to ignore the ugly probabities until they become ugly realities. Then you point the finger of blame at everybody else and ask, Why aren't you helping more, faster, yesterday?
I was gathering intelligence today, recieving earth bases satelite video transmissions. (I think you humans call it watching teevee.)
I saw there are thousands of people in New Orleans who desperately need help, and some of them are shooting at their rescuers! Guess who gets rescued last?
I came to this planet hoping to find an intelligent species in charge.
I'll have to report back to my superiors - this planet is devoid of intelligent life.